Killer smile, neat facial hair, that casual ‘just leaning up against my truck here’ stance. Brace yourself, this month’s Skip Hunk is tall, dark and rubbish at telling jokes.
Those teeth look like they’re all your own, so we’re guessing you’ve not got too many miles on the clock. How many, exactly?
And barely a filling in sight! So where do you work?
Call-A –Skip (UK) Ltd, Saltley, Birmingham. Driver, and whatever else needs doing. Owner in training.
Might not want to let the boss know you’re plotting a coup. Purely for CV purposes, what’s the best bit of the job?
Spending time with my family, and coming up with new ways to deal with rubbish.
The endless quest to solve the nation’s rubbish problem is close to our hearts too. Surely there can’t be part of this wonderful world of waste you don’t adore?
All the red tape, and ever changing regulations.
Indeed, so much time spent on rules and regulations barely leaves a man time to floss, or precision trim his beard. Or do anything else, such as…?
Sleep and dream about skips. Exercise, go out with friends, football, chill.
Ah, the skips fixation is strong we see. How long have you had it?
Skips have always been in my blood since I could walk, thanks to my dad and uncle.
Pretty sure you can get medication for that. Try hard to imagine a world without skips – what would you have wanted to be?
I wouldn’t have minded being someone famous.
Well Attila the Hun is quite famous, but we’re guessing you’re a lover, not a fighter. A real pussy cat perhaps?
I’d be a lion, so I can be king of the jungle.
Ooh, steady tiger. Grrr. And what would kitty like to eat?
Steak and chips, followed by chocolate fudge cake.
Protein, fries and plenty of sugar. Our kind of diet. Talking of tasty fayre, who’s your ideal Skip Chick?
I’ll have to say my girlfriend Shamaila, as she’s going to read this. Beyonce and Mila Kunis are a close second.
And with the world your oyster, a global smorgasbord of places to take her, where would you head on your dream date?
Have to be somewhere that serves steak and chips.
Right… so we’re sensing you may be a middle of the road kinda chap after all. Tell us something about yourself that’ll blow our socks off.
I passed my HGV test when I was 19, so I was one of the youngest HGV drivers in the West Midlands. And I’ve got an MDes in Transport Design.
Impressive. With that infectious smile, we’re eating out of your hand here. Tell us a joke and we’re all yours.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Na…cho cheese! Not your cheese… get it?
Err… right. One of those you’ve got to hear. Or not. Well at least you’ve made a fabulous Skip Hunk!